Also, I am thinking about the next installment of Br. Paphnutius, but not quite sure where it is going yet.
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And at even, when the sun did set, they brought unto him all that were diseased, and them that were possessed with devils. And all the city was gathered together at the door. And he healed many that were sick of divers diseases, and cast out many devils; and suffered not the devils to speak, because they knew him. (vs. 32-34)
There is on the internet something called "Yahoo Answers" and, as the name implies, it is a forum where you can ask questions and pose observations that anyone is free to reply to. As you can imagine, it is quite the cross-section of contemporary western culture. (I find it quite fascinating from a sociological point of view.) There are all the usual things you would expect: kids asking for homework help (or hoping you will just do their assignment for them), automotive questions, dating and relationship quandries, political debates and, of course, religious discussions.
When it comes to religion, specifically Christianity, there are an awful lot of terms bandied about with what I imagine is a rather limited comprehesion of what they really (or what the questioner imagines them to) mean. Words like "sin", "God", "hell", and "atheism" just to name a few. Invariably, the thrust of the argument runs something akin to: this doesn't make any sense to me, therefore it couldn't possibly be true, therefore it is not so.
I fear that so much damage has been done in the name of "religion" (which I am here contrasting with authentic, informed Christian belief), that some people have been pemanently scarred by it. "God", for them, can be a grumpy old man in the sky, a distant (and useless) mental construct or simply the supervisor of His fearsome spokesmen in pulpits everywhere where actual Christianity is exchanged for politics, race-baiting, gender concerns, sexual orientation or any of a whole host of other 'gods' to be worshipped, feared or rejected as the case may be. (This always puts me in mind of Psalm 138:1, which says "I will praise thee with my whole heart: before the gods will I sing praise unto thee." Who are the gods of today? Well, Mt. Olympus may have been vacated, but just look at the tabloids, the evening news, the self-help section of your local bookstore or celebrity marketing campaigns and you will find just about everything being offered for worship, consumption or rejection.)
We really do need to start over again and re-teach what Christianity actually is. And these verses from St. Mark are a good case in point. Rumour spread about what Jesus had done and look what happens. He becomes a consumer commodity, a healing/exorcism factory. Now I don't mean to paint with too broad a brush and imply that everyone who came to Him in these verses had the same attitude. But no doubt there were many who did, and who continue to do so today.
And whether it is due to misconceptions, scandal at the poor behaviour or bizarre beliefs of other Christians (and "christians") or simply to personal ignorance, I would say to anyone who has declared themselves to be an atheist: I probably don't believe in the god that you have rejected either. What you fear and imagine God to be, that is certainly not the One encountered in the Scriptures, in the teaching of the orthodox Fathers, in those among us here on earth who are already so in love with God that they manifest the charity of heaven here and now.
And if you say to me: where do I even begin? I would say: right here. I started this book in order to perhaps make the Christian religion a little more accessible. The Gospel of Mark is short. It can be read in a matter of days with little effort. And, it tells you everything you need to know without getting in to more advanced theology.
And if you are gun-shy about attending a Church, I can't say that I blame you. Some are as bad as they seem, some go about doing and believing that which is essential without trumpeting their achievements, some are filled with the self-righteous, some are filled with the actually righteous.
But there is something so essential to community, something hard-wired in to us as humans to depend on each other in relationship, that it is almost impossible to 'go it alone' (excepting, of course, those with the privileged vocation to be hermits). So if what you have tried doesn't work, go somewhere else. Keep looking, praying that you be lead where you need to be. Be open, but wary, at the same time. But, wherever you are at, don't forget that Jesus loves you. He wants you to come to Him alone. He has already done all the work that needs to be done in order to gain eternal life. He sees your wounds and doesn't hold them against you. He knows you better than you know yourself. He is ready to give you everything that you need in this life, but not everything that you think you want. He only asks one thing, that you let yourself be a recipient of His grace.* He does not ask anything from you but yourself. And there it is again, our own need stands starkly exposed. Once again the strength of a relationship will be tested. [This is referring to a previous section where I talk about how it is often easier to be generous to others than it is to ask for their generosity toward us in our own needs. It compels us to test the waters as it were, to see where we really stand in relation to those we call friends. And that can be a risky thing, frought with fear and uncertainty. What if what is actually there is not what I imagined or desired it to be?] But there is no need to fear. Others may disappoint, but He can handle it.
*Even that itself is of God. While it is true that we are free to make decisions, that does not mean that we can do so in and of ourselves (a heresy called semi-pelagianism).The very desire for God comes from God Himself. He gives us the grace to will to come to Him, but that does not make the choice any less our own. As has been said elsewhere, God's foreknowledge does not in any way lessen our own freedom.
